Someone Knew

I love you and always will but I can no longer beg or force you to stay.
I don’t know how much more pain and heartbreak my heart can take.
Don’t fall in love with a poet because your heart will break and you know it.
I wish someone had told me that before I fell so deep in love with you.
Within your circle of friends someone knew that you were falling in love with someone new.
But you kept me waiting all this time just so you could let me down like gravity.
I gave you the galaxy but somehow you still needed more space – that was very imprudent of you.
My Buzz Lightyear heart was willing to love you to infinity and beyond.
The buzz my love gives out could last for light-years so this is more than just another Toy Story.
Love does not know the pain it heals and pain does not know the love it seeks.
It’s hard walking away from a girl whose arms I’ve always wanted to run into.
What should I do now with the love that I have always wanted to give to you?
Someone knew that you were gradually falling in love with someone new.
You should have known where I was coming from; I was doing just fine before you came along.
Someone knew that there was a possibility that I closed myself off from loving someone new because of you.

Jacaranda Purple

Don’t make homes out of people because they always leave and take everything you own with them.
Home doesn’t feel like home without you and because of that I’ve stopped building homes out of people.
But I saw the beauty of the world in your eyes and it always gave me hope.
I’ve been feeling homeless and now I’m always home a lot less because of you.
You are as beautiful on the inside as you are on the outside and that’s why people are still drawn to your aura.
Depression hit harder than the recession, it had me regressing and constantly questioning my level of progression.
Purple jacaranda petals spread all around my feet as I patiently wait for my heart to make a sound.
This hopeful romantic knows that hearts get broken like mirrors, records and promises do.

All the jacaranda trees in Pretoria still remind me of the beauty that is you.
When the relentless heat of the sun drove me crazy all I could think about was your smile and those hazel-brown eyes.
I spend some nights drinking my favourite wine by myself but this bottle of Pinotage will always taste better in your presence.
I still want to hold your heart like the lonely autumn trees hold the fragility of clinging leaves.
But you’re no longer mine to love and the thought of you being with someone else kills me.
Hearts fall to the ground like jacaranda petals do but unfortunately the view is not so beautiful.
Purple jacaranda petals spread all around on every street as I patiently wait for my heart to make a sound.

“It was when I stopped searching for home within others and lifted the foundations of home within myself, I found there were no roots more intimate than a mind and body that have decided to be whole.” – Rupi Kaur

Dead Fish

It’s funny how things change,
you used to mean everything to me.
Just so you know, only dead fish go with the flow
and I’ll never be a “go with the flow” type of lover.
I don’t ever want to wade into love with you.
I want you to love me wholeheartedly
but if that’s something you don’t know how to do,
then maybe you should pack up your uncertainty
and just move on with the rest of your life.
It’s funny how things change,
you used to mean everything to me.

Suffocating Me

My earphones are as tangled up as the words that I’ve tried to say to you.
The words that I’ve constantly tried to say to you are now suffocating me.
Depriving me of the air I need to breathe when I think about what we both could be.
Here I stand gradually disintegrating just so I can try to remain whole.
I wanted to escape from the cold and nestle myself deep inside your soul.
But you’ve changed now and you’re no longer the same person that I fell for.
Allow me to whisper the words that held together the shattering glass that you’ve become.
I know that through their utterance you will finally feel your heart beating to the rhythm of our love again.
My earphones are as tangled up as the words that I’ve tried to say to you.
The words that I’ve constantly tried to say to you are now suffocating me.

Good Enough

i’m walking away from vulnerability
and slowly starting to close my heart off,
i think i’m better off using my heart less.
i was close to the cliff like Clair Huxtable
but a part of me felt like jumping off.
maybe i should leave my heart on Pluto
and consider becoming permanently heartless.
pain and heartbreak come in the morning
when the sun is shining and the wind is blowing.
i know i probably look like a fool right now,
expressing all my feelings in full right now.
i have been wracking my brain all day
and constantly wondering what to do right now.
you made letting go seem so easy, i want to be just like you.
detachment was always something you were good at.
i still miss you right after my first cup of coffee in the morning.
i’m losing sleep praying that i’ll be good enough for you.
i know i probably look like a fool right now,
expressing all my feelings in full right now.
mi amor, it’s evident that you’re the one that i adore.
so when i say that you’re the one know that i am sure.
i still miss you right before my last glass of wine in the evening.
love isn’t love if i cannot have the chance of sharing it with you.
i’m losing sleep praying that i’ll be good enough for you.
let’s start over because my heart says that you’re the one.

Too Many Love Poems

i know you know that i write too many love poems
but i know that already, so please tell me something new
tell me what you think of No Ordinary Muse or August Blue
i tend to forget about every heartbreak that i’ve ever had
the moment my fingers pick up a pen and write the pain away
lately all these love poems have begun to sound the same
i’m starting to think that my right wrist is getting quite rusty
i don’t know much about the world around me these days
hearts get broken like mirrors, records and promises do
i want to love until my time is up like God left the clock on the ceiling
i write too many love poems lately
because love is something that i can actually understand

Chances Given (Starting Over)

The world has made you feel like an abandoned church but in my eyes you’ll always be a cathedral.
Don’t leave me sitting here alone because no amount of vodka or morphine will ease the pain.
I stood in the rain patiently awaiting your arrival but then I eventually realised that you were the rain.
Your darkness balances out my light, and that’s one of the things that I love about you.
The ocean in your eyes reminds me of the colour of the sky and how I want to dive into the depths of you.
Let me romance you all over again so that you can feel the moment you first fell in love with me.
I want to write poems for you again so that you remember the feeling of losing your breath at the emotions they brought.
I know you miss the smile you once held while falling asleep and the sense of hope and love I brought to your world of loneliness.

You cannot seem to remember how you got to loving me, it all seems to be a distant memory.
What you feel is real but there once came a point in your life where detachment became the only way to cope.
Now I’m standing in front of you with the purpose of providing love and hope.
I know you miss the smile you once held while falling asleep to beautiful poems and peaceful dreams.
Don’t leave me behind because love like yours is hard to find and my words can attest to this.
I once said that you seem to ruin anything good going for you but that’s a lie.
Chances have already been given so let’s both start over because my heart says that you’re the one.